Jerry Johnson, 50 Raytheon Manager Gerard M. (Jerry) Johnson of Melrose, a longtime Raytheon employee, died suddenly November 5. He was 50. Johnson was employed as a Senior Human Resource Manager at Raytheon Network Centric Systems in Marlborough, the most recent assignment of a 20-year career with Raytheon that included work at facilities in Burlington, Wayland, Bedford, and Andover. During the course of that time, he was involved in every aspect of human resources from employment and compensation to labor and employee relations. During the 1990s, Johnson led HR teams working on international startups in Asia Pacific, a challenge that took him to remote sites in the Marshall and Kwajalein Islands and Johnston Atoll. Johnson particularly enjoyed these entrepreneurial assignments though they kept him away from home for months at a time. In his professional work, he had also been especially engaged in mentoring young MBAs through Raytheons Human Resource Leadership Development Program. He forged many intergenerational friendships as a result of this work. Before joining Raytheon, Johnson had served eight years in the U.S. Army with assignments through the U.S., Panama, Germany, and Canada. He completed his service as a Major. Johnson was a 1975 graduate of the U.S. Military Academy at West Point, NY, with a B.S. Degree in Engineering. While serving in Kansas, he completed a Master of Science Degree in Education in 1986 from Kansas State University, Manhattan, KS. In 2002, Raytheon sponsored his participation in the University of Michigan Executive Education Program in Strategic Human Resource Panning. He was also a Qualified Administrator of the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), a Certified Compensation Professional (CCP) through WorldatWork, and a Qualified Six Sigma Specialist. In his parish of St. Mary of the Annunciation Church in Melrose, he had been active with his wife for more than ten years as a member of the Marriage Preparation Team. Johnson is survived by his wife, Donna Milmore of Melrose, and daughters, Alison Johnson of Melrose, Caitlin Schnicker of Bostons North End, and Erin Schnicker and son-in-law, Scott Wheeler, both of Brookline. He leaves his brothers, John B. Johnson and his wife, Andrea, of Wellesley, and Frank C. Johnson of Vienna, VA. He was also the uncle of Brian, Gregory, and Neil Johnson of Wellesley, and Erin and Adam Johnson of Davidson, MD. The funeral will be held from the Gately Funeral Home 79 W. Foster St. Melrose on Sat. Nov. 8th at 8AM. Funeral mass in St. Mary's Church, Herbert St. Melrose, at 9AM. Relatives and friends invited. Visiting hours Friday 4-8PM. Burial in Wyoming Cemetery Melrose. In lieu of flowers memorial contributions may be made to the Dr. Consoli Mission, 425 Lebanon St. Melrose 02176 or to Dorchester Youth Alternative Academy, 1532 Dorchester Ave. Dorchester 02122. Eulogy given by Jerry's wife Donna And then there was Jerry Jerry would want me to thank you all for coming today. He would also want to offer you a drink, but since this is not the proper venue, I ask you all to raise a toast to him in your own way and in your own time. He would appreciate and enjoy that. As many of you know, Jerry is my second husband chronologically and my first in every other way. He came into my life and my daughters 19 years ago, an absolute miracle who was open - for whatever reason only he will know - to the prospect of engaging an entire family in his courtship. I recall Jerrys arrival at my house for our first date - something he insisted upon although for my own reasons, I had pushed for something off-site. He later told me that his training, both in his family and at West Point, had taught him to meet a lady at her home. Some would say, me included, that there was also an element of reconnaissance going on here, in that he may have wanted to scope out just how large and complex this mission might be. But, in any case, as you all know, he took on that mission - of husband and father - with unlimited energy, enthusiasm, and an ever-present humor that was to change our lives. What greeted him that first night in July 1984, he later described as four little steps: Alison, at 3, Caitlin, 7, Erin, 11, and a babysitter who was not much older. They stood in the front hall, staring. Only Jerry could diffuse a situation like that, which he did, with confidence, humor, and blatant bribes about trips to Chuckee Cheese. Forgive the tangent at this point, as I flash forward to Caitlins recollection of the actual trip to Chuckee Cheese (the first of many, many wonderful Jerry-planned outings for us as a family). Sitting with Alison, strapped into their seatbelts in the backseat of Jerrys car, she wondered out loud to me, Mummy, why are we going so slow? And, from the passenger seat, I glanced at the speedometer. We were hovering around 12 mph. Cars were literally whizzing by us on 93. And then, the explanation, from Jerry - face-forward, white-knuckling the steering wheel - Ive never driven children before. Though somewhat incredulous to a carpooling mom, this revelation gave hint of how seriously this man would later take his parenting responsibilities. Back to the neighborhood and the night of his introduction to the girls, the meeting took a turn when Alison clung to me outside the house, literally hugging my legs and begging me not to go far or go on the highway. A neighbor came by at that point and Alison - always easily distracted from a task -- to this day -- turned her attention to the neighbors children and I was forgotten. I tell you this story - and some of you have heard this before - because of what then transpired in the car as we drove to Boston. I was silent and conflicted for several miles, clearly not making any first date efforts at conversation. Jerry, too, was silent, and as we passed the Skating Rink in Stoneham - you can see how vividly I recall this moment - he said, I know you feel really badly about leaving the girls. I dont know that much about kids but from what Ive seen as an uncle, I think its hard for ALL parents, not just mothers who are single. Then he said nothing else for a long while - VERY unJerry-like behavior - and allowed me to process the acceptance and reassurance that was his message. I truly think the possibility of a relationship began at that point. And, 19 years later, what I can stand here and tell you is that Jerry had a deep confidence in himself coupled with a HUGE heart that allowed him to join - and to ultimately transform - our family. Gentlemen, youll excuse me when I say, I dont think there are many men who could walk into an all-female household and create the role that Jerry did. A guy with two older brothers, who went to an all boys high school, followed by West Point and a military career. It must have been culture shock, and in the early days, Ill amid to anxiety when I saw that he was never unpacking his dop kit, just traipsing back and forth with it to the bathroom. Made me feel like slightly nervous. Joining families is difficult enough, and I - as many of you know - have been viewed as a bit compulsive in my parenting. Who, but Jerry, could have forged the role which he did with three little girls? And then adapt that role over the years to accommodate their growth and their challenges; their many accomplishments and their moments teetering on the edge, as he would say. Some might wonder why he would have spent SO SO many countless hours listening to me talk about the girls. And, I wondered myself at times. Perhaps, he knew - and was secure in this knowledge - that I loved him and valued him and believe that there is no other man quite as special as Jerry Johnson or as well matched for me and our daughters. He is in a class entirely by himself. Now, that said, I can never resist a teachable moment. And knowing the number of young people who are here today - and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for supporting the girls and me - Im seizing this opportunity to tell you something and its VERY important. Listen to me when I say, the most successful relationships are NOT about romance and passion. Trust me, these are fleeting. Relationships are about friendship. That was the theme of our wedding 15 years ago, and boy, were we right on target. If you marry your best friend, you have a fighting chance to make your relationship work in these sad times of disposable marriage. Be careful, choose wisely, and make sure your values are in sync. For Jerry and me, the relationship was about friendship and faith. If youve got the faith component - doesnt matter which religious framework - youve got the glue to keep yourselves together. Since this is about Jerry, I know hed want me to move on to talk a lot about HIM. When I was hesitant about having a military escort at the cemetery today, Caitlin reminded me, You know Jerry would want all the fanfare he could get! Indeed. And as Erin has wisely advised me over the past few days in planning the services, think of what youd want, Mum - and do the opposite! Jerry did enjoy being the center of attention, always with that quick wit. Holding court in our family room. Sharing the latest joke he picked up at work. Standing, drink in one hand, gesturing with damn cigarette in the other. Getting people to laugh - and laughing along with them. I recall writing the opening lines of his 40th birthday invitation: Jerry Johnsons a party guy; a kind of fellow neither quiet nor shy Was that not Jerry? There are many dimensions to Jerry Johnson. Yet, even as I say that - and it might sound like a contradiction - he was quite uncomplicated. Lets think about the different dimensions for a minute: there was a military component undeniably. Anyone whos visited his den gets a glimpse of a side of Jerry that I find so impressive and yet I never experienced directly. The plaques, awards, weapon-like things that adorn his wall. What interested me most were the photos of him with his military companies and the lavish presentations and certificates that they would give him as he moved on to another assignment. His men - and he said that as a leader of men, loved him. It was the military, he told me, that taught him how to manage. Although I didnt know him in those days, I could see in his Raytheon career the philosophy that he took from the Army. He was all about developing people, young people in particular. Whether our daughters or the young MBAs with whom he worked, he was truly invested in their growth. And he delighted in their company. Now, Jerry and I have always marveled at how we seem canonize everyone who dies. And I know Jerry did not think of himself as a saint, nor would he want to be idealized in death. So, I must share with you a role - perhaps the only role - in which Jerry will NOT be missed. And that is, as HANDYMAN. I had initially misconstrued his engineering degree as aptitude for fixing things. What was I thinking? Life with Jerry slowly and painfully demonstrated the flaws of this assumption. Id like to quote here from a letter that landed on my doorstep within hours after the news of Jerrys death. It is from our friends and neighbors, Peter & Eileen McSherry: I admit I cannot yet accept the news, so vivid in my mind are recent images of meeting Jerry as we walked by from a Halloween party. He was chopping the bushes in the front of the house. He admitted he had no idea what he was doing, but was just giving it a go because it was his assigned task. So quintessentially Jerry combining whimsy and practicality in a uniquely funny way. We joked about his being Jerry Scissorhands and he brandished the clippers about, dressed not for yard work but in his comfortable Jerry clothes. A SWEATER GUY if ever there was one. Hard to think of him in the military, jumping out of aircraft in Panama. A sharp mind, able to parse complicated strategies, and yet a SWEATER GUY. For those of you who dont know Jerry that well, I encourage you to take a look at the online Guestbook maintained by the Funeral Home. The girls and I are laughing, crying, and learning new things about Jerry as we read peoples comments. But for now, other dimensions of Jerry that you should know about? Caitlin helped me synthesize this: FUN. Mum, if you took a poll, thats the word that comes to mind. He was a fun guy. He was all about a good time, whether with the family, his beloved golfing buddies, his colleagues at work, our neighbors, and many friends. Essentially, anyone he met. He was undiscriminating. And that was another piece of his uncomplicated self. Whether it was an electrician who came to the house, a new guy at work, the person next in line at Dunkin Donuts, Jerrys take was positive: REALLY nice guy, Donna! REALLY nice guy. And, of course, FAMILY. Jerry loved and took great pride in his family. His mother, Kay, truly an icon in this family; Uncle Frank, the man whom he considered a father, since he lost his own at age 10; his brother, John and sister-in-law, Andrea; brother, Frank; and again that theme of youth emerges with his clear affinity for nephews, Brian, Greg, Neil, and Adam, and niece, Erin. He loved these kids and they, returning his love, were a catalyst for his humor, egging him on, engaging him in war stories, and making him feel like the beloved uncle he was. Ive given some thought to his philosophy about life - not that Jerry EVER would have used that kind of language, but here are the things he was known to espouse and that have influenced all of us: Moderation in all things, including moderation. Note that my girls loved that one, particularly as they reached drinking age. Who dares, wins. This, in encouraging me - the ultra-conservative - to take risks. And finally, one that I continually share with others, because I have seen its value in my own life and I owe the positive results to Jerry: Expect the best. And indeed Jerry did expect the best and give it to all whom he touched. In closing, Id like to borrow from Peter Tuohy, a lifelong friend of Jerrys from Brooklyn. Who didnt love Jerry? In the end, isnt that something we would all want to be said of ourselves?